My dear wife Carol, the originator of this blog, passed away in October 2016.


I will be closing the blog on 31st July 2017 so if there is anything you want to re-read or save please feel free to do it before that date.

I miss Carol greatly, she was my wife, my soul mate and my best friend.  She was also a great source of information and I learned a great deal from her.  I believe it was because of her background as a Librarian.  On most subjects I regarded her as a better source of relevant information than the internet.

It is ironic and in a sad way almost pleasing that she did not die from the MS that she fought so bravely and for so long.  It was cancer that killed her, a massive tumour that had started in her lung and was affecting her ribs and spine.  There were no symptoms until approx 2 months before her death when she gradually became more unsteady on her feet, and even then Carol and I (and her GP) assumed that it was the MS getting worse.  It was not until she couldn’t walk or get out of bed that she was taken into hospital and quickly diagnosed.

I have nothing but praise for the nurses and doctors in our much maligned National Health Service they tried their best to shrink the tumour with radio therapy and when it became clear that it was not working the palliative care she received in hospital was excellent.  They even let me bring in Dora her cat who she missed terribly and Dora curled up on the bed beside her and stayed there nearly all day.

The plan was to get her to a point where she could come home and spend her last few days in a more comfortable and friendly environment. Eventually everything was in place, a care package arranged and a hospital bed installed downstairs.  The ambulance bought her home about midday on the Monday 17th October.  She enjoyed seeing the garden and Dora again and she appeared to be improving, she even planned what TV to watch that evening.  I slept downstairs beside her on a camp bed.  On the Tuesday she gradually deteriorated throughout the day and by the early evening I had to call out her GP and the district nurse.

They did some tests and then told me that she was getting near the end.  The Doctor stabilised her and said he would call back later and the nurse said she would stay for a while.  The nurse went out to her car to get some equipment, and during the few minutes she was gone Carol passed away.

It was a terrible time but at least she had her last day in the home she loved.

I am grateful for that day as I am for the 10 wonderful years we had together.